Friday, March 27, 2009


More than a handful of women have 'SECRETLY' hired me to design their landscape. WHY? Why do men stop women from gardening? Mostly they don't want their lawn changed. What is the most harmful feature of American landscapes? THE LAWN. Fertilizer, chemicals, water, gas powered lawn-mower. What are the other reasons? Change. Not wanting change.
LOVELY called for a design and explained she & PRICKLES, her husband, were retired. PRICKLES is always home. How could she hide me? We covertly planned lunch. PRICKLES, LOVELY & I had a delightful lunch, and as expected, PRICKLES went to the basement to play on his computer. LOVELY & I walked her garden and I did her landscape design. With feverish searching eyes LOVELY scanned her kitchen & family room for signs of PRICKLES before paying me in cash.
PEONY wanted a landscape design & told me up front her husband, GOLFER, must never know. Could I come during a very specific time? PEONY had a lovely landscape but wanted a good tweaking. Knowing his golf schedule she timed my landscape design to the minute. With feverish searching eyes, and paying cash, PEONY made sure I was out of her driveway 1/2 hour before GOLFER was due home.
CHEF recently bought a circa 1960's home on acreage. The previous owner's landscape crew, TESTOSTERONE ON WHEELS, showed up. CHEF told them how she wanted it done. No ma'am that's not how it's really done, they said. CHEF said, Well, there's a new sheriff in town. Weeks later, CHEF asked TESTOSTERONE ON WHEELS, again, to mow according to her tastes on her property. You know where this is going don't you? TESTOSTERONE ON WHEELS was summarily fired.
When I began to garden COLLEGE BOY said, You can't do that. Like an idiot I listened. After 3 years of 'partially' gardening, with fabulous results, I began to garden in earnest. Without telling COLLEGE BOY anything I began to garden from my soul. In exchange I do all the gardening myself and pay for it myself.
More stories but this post is already too long.
What have we done, as a society, to let anyone (male or female) think they can stop another person from gardening?
Garden & Be Well, XO Tara


Sheila said...

My husband gave up years ago! Persistence pays off!

Creative Country Mom said...

I'm with Sheila, mine just says "take care of it or I'll weed-eat it!" lol.... He's not that bad. But he does limit my borrowing his truck to "get groceries" lol... he's on to me! hugs...Brooke

Kim and Victoria said...

I feel so lucky. My husband and I garden....together! We compromise and talk through our decisions, and our ideas are always better for it.

Ryan said...

I cant help but strongly disagree with this post. Being a man myself I feel obliged to defend my sex, but on another hand I feel I have no real reason to do this as there is nothing to defend but the truth.

This is a narrow minded view based on very little fact and I don't think it is necessary or justified. Yes, I accept that this may have some truth but lets not stereotype here!

Quite disappointed at the quality of this post really.

lizzyinsa said...

Given the last comment I must respond and thank you for your most recent post. I am somewhat newly married (2yrs) and we just bought our new home which has NO LANDSCAPING whatsoever. It's basically a blank canvas. In the fall, I began to garden, starting with some climbing roses and this spring I have continued with other gardening projects and my husband seems to not like "all the flowers" and me "gardening and not spending time with him." I am persistant and have continued to do it since I've found out it's something that I truely love doing.

Anonymous said...

You are dead right about the lawn. We have been getting rid of our lawn and hope to make a dent again this summer. We are going natural. And we planted some dwarf bamboo here today and will have more photos of it tomorrow. It is the non invasive type and is one of the best things a person could grow for a whole variety of reasons that you probably already know about.

Ewa said...

Oh Tara. amazing post. I see some realities in common with stories I hear from friends.
I am catching up with your fabulous writing - I was away too long :)
Have a great weekend.