She called recently, "....help I'm in a new home. A decade +/- has passed, since I was at her river front home, with tennis court, terraces, gardens, a place her husband loved to whip up 50 close friends for a Saturday dinner, often. Perhaps the occasional movie star was feted at luncheon. Not uncommon were the fundraising events, significant funds, successfully secured for their various beloved non-profits.
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Do you know what happens to women like this? With age, their powers grow. Do you know the key component of these women? Aside from being matriarchs in every historic fiber, they are fun.
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(Bunny Mellon, below, is one of these women.)
Yesterday, we met at her new home, and began with a house tour, then lunch.
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Much to talk about, before the garden. Of course the garden threaded thru all.
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She's in a chapter not of her choosing, her husband died 3 years ago. Hope he heard her talking about him yesterday !
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Real estate could have been bought anywhere, and she chose the best. Near children/grandchildren. Plenty of mousetraps. (Don't know what a mousetrap is? Allurements, enticements, enjoy my homemade soups/cookies/grilling, play in the entertainment center stuffed with pool table/pingpong/tv/xbox/card table/stereo/sofas a veritable college fraternity house ca. 1980 at SMU but better...)
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The new arts center was mentioned for her city. Asked who was doing it, she said, "The city." Not that naive, I asked again. The group was mentioned, and I said, "They are all women aren't they?", "Yes."
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Told her what I knew of a similar effort, created decade+ ago, she wanted the woman's name who started it, and details about how the $$$ came in.
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Done. Then to the topic of romance & love. Books, movies, careers of others, cooking, decorating, gardening.....
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Pets.
We were in the sun room, 3 long walls of windows overlooking the garden. Her desk, in the living room, faces the garden, exactly as Noel Coward would have placed it.
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Before the appointment she invited me to an upcoming lecture given by, Andrea Wulf, The brilliant woman connecting the agrarian life of America's founding fathers to the content of their new form of government.
Childless, I had no playmates my own age since marriage. Oh my, the gift of infertility. Age 22, my friends were in their 70's. My grandmother's era. Tail end of that era, now passing. Matriarchal, philanthropic, cooks, decorators, readers, gardeners, spiritual, humorous, self-esteem, modest, stewardship, and every undefinable good thing.
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Asked if she saw, Selma. "No." Told her she should, it's another tale of agrarian lifestyle helping to form America. Martin Luther King created more than a non-violent protest, he used stewardship of livestock to protect his flock, literally. Pastor-guiding-a-flock was not cliche for March'in Luther, blessedly it was real, Selma was poorly done, hope someone truly does MLK properly soon.
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Then, her team. Girlfriend, has 'Thomas'. He gardens, cooks, decorates, irons, does laundry, opens boxes from moving & puts them away. In addition, she has Mr. Construction, Mr. Architect, and me. Noticed, years ago, smart chicks, age 50+, all have a team. Yes, I have a team. And their names are only passed along in the manner of stewardship of their time/talents.
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Ok, we finally made it into the garden.
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More fun. When I go back to draw en plein air, I will get pics for you. Yesterday was too full with work/laughter.
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One thing I know for sure, if it's not fun with a client, it is not a good match or we are doing something wrong. Truly, that is my barometer for work. Is it Fun?
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Poorly describing sublime attitudes, above, someone with 'credentials' describes them worse than poorly, below, he is wrong on a logarithmic scale. More terribly, it's in description of Bunny Mellon.
The NYT article quotes John Wilmerding, an American art scholar and trustee of the National Gallery of Art in Washington:
Bunny was part of a generation that no longer exists today: an amateur collector with a sure eye, great taste and upper-class refinement, who bought across the board, from expensive jewelry and paintings to trinkets.
Upper-class refinement? Not only a small lens, cracked. Bunny's generation is still here, at the tail, but still here. Performing their magic with all Providence has passed to them. Bunny was Bunny in spite of her 'upper-class refinement'. I know several of these women, money is not in great sums for most, but their attitudes/actions trump money.
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Garden & Be Well, XO Tara
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Bottom pics, La Contessa . Top pic, via Lunch & Lattte.
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Dear John Wilmerding, Bless your heart. Most don't 'see' the template of personality in women similar to Bunny. When you see these women, without a cracked lens, you will see them many places. Ironically, I'm sure at least one of them, if not more, have you in their flock.
7 comments:
LOVED THIS!
THANK YOU!!
LOVED your comment over at my PLACE!
Birds of a FEATHER is that what they say??
XOXO
Love this post, Tara; beautifully written. I love the "fun" litmus test, and I too have always had many friends of the Bunny-era. And just the glimpse of the top of the image at Contessa's home and in her sunroom made me so very happy! all best, A
I hear you on few friends due to so many not getting things out of our control. I also hear you on having fun at work...I need to get back to enjoying designing! And off the blog reading for a few days...
Wow. You nailed it. Fun. It short supply......it is what makes what we do "fun"!! And more than that; fulfilling!
You snuck those pics in of Elizabeth's gathering.....(Contessa for sure)
which perfectly illustrated your wonderful post!
Brava!! Yet again!!!
BRAVA!!!!!!!!
Let's celebrate FUN!!!! It is sadly lacking all over the place! In houses, gardens, people, life!!!!
CELEBRATE FUN!!!
I had some today showing (in the worst possible season; also during the drought) people from Lotusland and the owner of the lovely "Montecito" magazine; my garden (which is looking decidedly non-gardenly right now); as a "National Wildlife Federation Certified Backyard Habitat)!
They will be doing a story about it with paintings......(oh my heart!!!); and it is all about birds! Attracting them with your plants; keeping them safe with your plants; and nurturing and protecting their young with your plants!
Other wildlife, too!! FUN!!!!!
I need to republish my blog about the National Wildlife Federation Backyard Habitat Program! It is all free! And all of a sudden....you cannot even imagine what happens!
I adore your blog!!! Thank you, Tara!!!!!
I had fun just reading this, you all must have had a great time. Thanks.
So well put...you always get me thinking...love the pics from the Contessa's food camp!!
This post was enchanting! I've printed this out to put inside An Affair with a House to read over and over. I loved knowing about the table conversation, serious topics yes, but then topics of romance, books, cooking, decorating, gardens and pets--the dear corgi sitting a-begging--that my sisters and I talk about when we're together.
This was a treat.
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