Lunch: A Great Divorce Story

A client from years ago recently hired me again.  A Southern matriarch forever stretching the bounds of goodness, she made the decision, after widowhood, to downsize and move closer to children/grandchildren.
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There is a template of living in her realm, in addition to goodness.  Hospitality and courtesy.  Elegance & comfort too, she's an interior decorator.  Unpleasantness is not ignored, merely hit head on with clear eyes, thinking, action, moving forward to joy.
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Community activist, one charitable group she formed, decades ago, has raised significant funds, all plowed back into her community.  Book club, bible study group, & more......she's active



Of course our Garden Design work begins with lunch in the sunroom overlooking the garden.  Homemade chicken salad over lettuce, designer chips, crisp saltines marinated overnite in Tabasco/red pepper flakes/powdered ranch dressing, and iced tea.
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Conversation.
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Life lessons arrive to each, I've been fortunate, having many arrive in exactly this manner.
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With a wicked smile she said, "Hope you don't mind I shared your divorce story with a friend."  She knew I wouldn't mind.  My story needs to be shared.  Victim of alcoholic excesses with 30 year spouse, blah-ti-boring-blah, it is the pivot from victim to survivor, which is a terrible location to be stuck too, to thriver, and how it was achieved that must be told.  But not here today.  I have a new story from her.
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Her friend, long married, had finally reached a court date for divorce.  Wealthy, her husband was armed with Atlanta's best lawyer, and she was about to tank financially.  An amazing choice was made, from the bible.  She chose 10 of her closest friends who knew she, and her soon to be divorced husband, long and well.  She wanted her best girlfriends to stand with her, in court, to give her strength & love, and more importantly, bear witness.
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As all of these ladies, matriarchs all, filed into the court room, to sit with their friend, and look her husband in the eyes, he was vanquished.  He became flushed, and fidgety.  A jury of his peers, indeed.  Hushed words with his lawyer.
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The divorce settled equitably that day.  No one was taken advantage of, no one harmed financially.
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This woman used precepts of her longtime bible study, her only ammunition, and Providence smiled.  She chose not to be afraid, and put her faith in G*d.      



If this were a tv movie of the week, the script would be stupid.
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Instead, passing along the story, is strength.  Victim hood is a choice.  Hope is not foolish.  Bearing witness is a tool.  Do not be afraid to ask for help.
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After lunch we had desert, vanilla ice cream with Hershey's chocolate, 2 little cubes of homemade brownies, and a large red ripe strawberry with dollop of chocolate on top.
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Then I designed her backyard, and left with a check.
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Love my job.
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Garden & Be Well,     XO Tara
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Top pic, Bassett Furniture, bottom pic Ralph Lauren.

Using Color Restraint with Intensity

Intense restraint and another example of the color trinity green-brown-white.

Restraint so intense the terrace has become a proscenium for guests.
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Subtlety so rich the bluestone & granite become focal points.
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Humbling execution.
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Garden & Be Well,     XO Tara
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Pic Wendy Posard and Associates.  Definite teamwork between architect & owners.
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2 Tara Dillard questions a patio must answer, 'Is this patio so fabulous I must see inside the house?', 'Is this patio so incredible I must see the garden?'.  Yes & yes.

Lunch then Working the Muse

Last week at a jobsite, below.  

A 2nd appointment to draw on-site.

I knew mostly what the garden would look like.

Sideways conversations tell me more about what a garden should become.

When she offered lunch I knew it would make her garden better.

She apologized for the plates, not in good shape, they had belonged to her grandmother.  Precious, an old soul.
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After Lunch the Muse created:
 A roundabout in center of 4 oak trees on axis with the front door on axis with a gate creating a double axis, hedge of forsythia on lower slope hiding the street, cross axis with the roundabout for another double axis, foundation plantings removed espaliered sasanquas added & a pair of urns on plinths on axis with 2 front windows, 3 pair of low columns with urns, a bench shaded with figs in the orchard, a harvest table + chandelier in the crape myrtle allee, a garden cottage facing blueberries & fruit trees & Tara Turf, expanded deck with a window from the breakfast room turned into French doors, 3 sets of stairs at the deck, a gravel terrace from the drive to the deck, enlarged gravel parking court, moved existing shrubs to targeted zones hiding neighbor's homes, removed RxR ties from potager and reused concrete textured blocks, changed color of fencing & house, 3 stone benches within the forsythia hedge, all Tara Turf with entire garden riding mower available & etc.
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It felt like the Muse was taking dictation.  Uncovering what had been there for a century.  When the Muse is happy & working it feels like a drug.  No.  It is a drug.
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Garden & Be Well,  XO Tara
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A BLT no chemical lunch.  Wonderful.

Chairs after Lunch

 After the party, or lunch, chairs are pure narrative.

Warmth, connection.

Conversation.
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Grace.
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Garden & Be Well,     XO Tara
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Pics taken last month after lunch in the Conservatory.  Torte de Shelle top pic.

James Farmer

James Farmer, below, gardens, flowers, interiors.  

In Perry, GA.

His shop was closed Sunday, but I liked everything I saw.

Had lunch across the street at The Swanson.  Real food, cooked on site.  From scratch.

A quick trip to see the camellias peaking in nearby Fort Valley, GA, stayed at the New Perry Hotel, in Perry GA.  You know which room was mine, it had the balcony !
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If you're ever in middle Georgia this trip is the Southern thing to do.
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Garden & Be Well,  XO Tara
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Camellias tomorrow.  Wish I had taken pics of the old movie theatre, above, it's transforming into an antique shop with booths.  Pic, above, Roadside Rustic.

Lunch Ministry

Lunch Ministry.

Wildly productive.

Who do you target?  Why?

Providence conspired, for decades, to include Lunch Ministry in every Garden Design I create.

I say to certain clients. "You will have lunch and invite ________.  You'll join your Garden Club & host a meeting.  You will find a local Garden Tour, contact them and be included.  Friend getting married?  You will host a gathering.  You will send pics of your garden to xyz magazine."

She was gathering materials, above, for our lunch.  Things to talk about, information to share, not wanting to forget to include anything during our lunch.
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These things are not done for others.  Lunch Ministry is for you.  Your spirit.  Giving away what has been liberally given to you.  What you get back is profound & humbling.
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Garden & Be Well,     XO Tara
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Pics taken at jobsite this month.  Same client as several previous posts.  Please tell me you know what to do with the dirty dishes at Lunch Ministry.

Conservatory Dreamtime

You must have a Conservatory in your garden.  Direct connection to an experience of Australia's Dreamtime.  

Too many busy days had passed without being in my Conservatory.  I feel its loss in my spirit.  Yesterday's 14 minute lunch had-to-be in the Conservatory.  Short & out of proportion to what is gained.  Spiritual well is filled.  No words to describe this direct line to Dreamtime.  

Moments in the Conservatory are atonement.  And abiding.
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Garden & Be Well,       XO Tara
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If you want a garden that is a moat of grace around your home & life, contact me.
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Details about online design services.
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Learn action steps to creating your best garden & home when you hire me to speak to your group.
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Details about lecture titles here.
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I've written several garden books available on Amazon.

Fast Food at Home

Lunch at home on work days is always fast food.

Cottage cheese, pistachios, soup, vanilla yogurt.
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Back to work.
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Garden & Be Well,    XO Tara
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Pic last week.  Some days are too hectic for this much and it's cottage cheese, yogurt & an apple.

The Table, Diane Von Furstenberg

Lunch in the Conservatory yesterday.  Who can eat alone without a book?  

Had to make calls to clients, then leave for appointments.  The book remains anticipation.
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$2.02 from the thrift store I knew it would be worth it without perusing.  Diane Von Furstenberg is a huge supporter of the High Line Garden in NYC.  Better than expected, Diane's own garden in Connecticut is featured.
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Interiors, gardens, recipes.  Beautiful photography.
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Garden & Be Well,               XO Tara
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Pure catnip getting this book so cheap.  Plenty more here.

Lunch: Meandering & Productive

We've been having lunch for decades.  Yesterday's was planned for weeks.  Of course I had an unexpected jobsite visit in the time slot allotted for preparation.

 He appeared, with a bottle of wine, walking thru the back garden.

 And an appreciation for my new girls & what they're providing, below.

 Made egg salad sandwiches.  The heirloom girls are producing 6/day, they hatched the 1st week of April.

Instead of Greek yogurt with fresh fruit & local honey you see what time allowed, above.
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He can retire & I'm pushing him not to.  His house has new rooms available, children out of college.  We met when they were toddlers.  Peers in the Garden industry we spoke a lot of community activism.  Bringing a Garden perspective to groups without a hint of Garden in their soul.  We're already doing it and leverage ideas for more.
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Luxurious,  meandering conversation about work at the pace of lunch.  A deeper vein of gleaning.  Productive.
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Garden & Be Well,     XO Tara
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Of course we ate in the conservatory.  No time for pics there or the garden, it's fall fabulous at the moment, we both had appointments.  

Summer Lunch, Nigella Lawson

Both women work for international corporations, they're neighbors, each have beautiful lake views, and like to cook.  Garden too, they're my clients.  Finally, I had them to lunch in my sweet garden.  What was I thinking?  Me cook?  For them?

 Peach crisp wasn't too much of a stretch, above.  Used agave syrup for the 1st time.  Needed corn starch for a bit more thickening.  Crust was rolled in a box.  Perhaps the puff pastry from a box next time.

Nigella Lawson's, Forever Summer, cookbook beckoned, above.  Salad with chicken, mango, lime, scallions, cilantro, touch of peanut & sesame oil.  She  mentioned serving it on a platter.
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Too humid & mosquitowy for lunch in the Conservatory we were inside at the harvest table.
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We 3 were on vacation at this lunch.  At least that's what it felt like to me. 
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Garden & Be Well,            XO Tara
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pics taken last week.